I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
