where am i from again
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
