question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Randomize
