I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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