well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
