I hate all girls vehemently.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize