Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
