Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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