she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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