It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
you never un-have a 4some
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
