don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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