I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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