i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
