Nicole vs. Life
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
being pregnant is like rehab
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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