ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize