i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
