I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Randomize
