I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
