Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize