On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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