Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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