question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
