it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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