On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
