An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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