I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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