all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
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