girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
