does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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