I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
