so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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