He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
