Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
