Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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