i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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