i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize