Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
