im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize