I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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