just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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