Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
