that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
