At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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