I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
