Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
