But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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