Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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