I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
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