so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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