weddingsv make me drug and hornr
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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