butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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