i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
